Too funny thx Priorfatgirl.

I copied this from Priorfatgirl blog,(who I love reading). This just made my day. I hope it makes yours too.

Happy Monday! Here is a funny story someone emailed me – at least I’m not the only one who feels this way towards the end of the workout week!
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For my 50th Birthday, my husband bought me a weeks worth of personal training sessions at the local health gym. Although I am still in great shape since playing on my high school softball team, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer, Bruce, who identified himself as a 26 year old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My husband seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started. The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress, here it is:

Monday: Started my day at 6:00am. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Bruce waiting for me. He is something of a Greek God – with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!! Bruce gave me a tour and showed me the machines. He took my pulse after five minutes on the treadmill. He was alarmed that my pulse was so fast, but I attribute it to standing next to him in his Lycra aerobic outfit. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which he conducted his aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring. Bruce was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time he was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!
Tuesday: I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Bruce made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air – then he put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Bruce’s rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT!! It’s a whole new life for me.
Wednesday: The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying on the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn’t try to steer or stop. Bruce was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. His voice is a little too perky for early in the morning and when he scolds, he gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying. My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Bruce put me on the stair monster. Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Bruce told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. He said some other junk too.
Thursday: Bruce was waiting for me with his vampire-like teeth exposed as his thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn’t help being a half an hour late, it took me that long to tie my shoes. Bruce took me to work out with dumbbells. When he was not looking, I ran and hid in the lockeroom room. He sent Susan to find me, then, as punishment, put me on the rowing machine – I sank.
Friday: I hate that bastard Bruce more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world Stupid, skinny, anemic little cheerleader wanna-be bastard. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat him with it. Bruce wanted me to work on my triceps. I don’t have any triceps! And if you don’t want dents in the floor, don’t hand me the &*@*#$ barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich. (Which I am sure you learned in the sadist school you attended and graduated magna cum laude from, you Nazi bastard.) The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn’t it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?
Saturday: Bruce left a message on my answering machine in his grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing him made me want to smash the machine with my planner. However, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the *$@#&& Weather Channel.
Sunday: I’m having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my husband will choose a gift for me that is fun – like a root canal or a hysterectomy.

Cyber Monday

Couldn't post for the last 4 days. On Thanksgiving I got a computer virus. Geez. Computer was down all weekend. Ended up just buying a new computer. Well, on weigh in, I lost 3 lbs. So I am down 27 lbs. On Thanksgiving I knew I was  going off the diet. I did have some cheese and crackers and Turkey and stuffing little of each and then filled my plate with roasted veggies. I did not have any dessert. I did not exercise per-se. I kept thinking I would go to the gym and I didnt. It was so frickin cold all weekend.(Remember, I am from So Cal so anything below 65' I need ugg boots.). I went shopping on Black Friday. I got up at 2am and went to Kohls for the 3:00 am opening. Man it was crazy. I entered at 3:00 finished shopping by 3:20 and then stayed in line til 5am to check out.  Well its back to lunch walks and tons of water and no cheating again. Hope everyone had a wonderful and safe Thanksgiving.

Wednesday and again time to weigh

I have positive thoughts for tonight, (fingers crossed). I have really amped up the exercise and water intake. Today at work, so far, has been crazy. Tomorrow will be a huge test for me. I dont expect to fall to far. Maybe just a little, I can have veggies so that is awesome. Kids want to go shopping on Black Friday.. I dread it. They want to hit up Kohls at 3:00am. I think this shit is out of hand. But we will see what happens. Happy Thanksgiving all!

Rainy Saturday

I love rain, especially today. I can just kick back in my sweats and do housework and laundry. Hopefully watch paranormal show. My favorite TV. Still doing well on the diet. Cant wait for Monday- Monday night football. Yippee. Of course, I want my weekend to last as long as possible. Post my pix. Need to post my before pix also. Hopefully soon.

Friday and feelin fine

I am so happy it is Friday and we are to have rain this weekend. I told my sweats before I left for work to be patient,  "momma's coming home to them soon". Gosh I love my sweats. Am I the only one that thinks sweats are the best weekend clothes to wear on a rainy weekend? (Could be) I am walking every day now up to 25 minutes and when at home I work with free weights for another 10 minutes or so. I am more than ever determined to make this weight come off a bit faster.  Weekends I hit the gym and the treadmill and other equipment. I have increased my water. Baby I am in the momentum and I am goin for it. I feel so much better in my clothes. Sure people may notice something, but definitely not that I lost almost 25 lbs. But you know what that is ok. In time all they will notice, that I am sure of. I feel very positive. Have a great weekend.

Results are in

Ok, I wasnt surprised (disappointed)but I lost 2 lbs. Now I know I should be happy and what ever. But shoot, I doubled the exercise this week and did everything right. Oh well, I am not going to give up. I will try harder. One absolutely great thing happened at class tho, they are now adding veggies to the diet. I am so stoked. I now see Thanksgiving being much better for me. I love veggies, all kinds, so now I can eat with the family and not be such an oddball. ( I will still be an oddball) but you know what I mean. I am looking forward to cooking, I love to cook. Talk to you soon

Hump day

Ok tonight is weigh in. I really have pumped it up with exercise and stayed faithful to the diet and you know what, my weight does look like it will be much of a lose. I am sure maybe 1-2 lbs, but really that sucks. I mean I have been struggling to be faithful and need more incentive than that. Oh puck,(not really the word I wanted to use) its not like I am going to cheat, but geez it is tough. I am tempted daily with just wanting a bite here or there. But then I guess that is the reason why I am where I am.  Well we will see.

Tuesday

Well its Tuesday and its just a so-so day. It was really busy in the AM at work, because someone called in sick (again). I feel blue, not sure why. Maybe because I have been on this diet for nearly 5 weeks and I was really hoping to have lost more weight. I am down 21.5 lbs and weigh in is tomorrow. I have kicked everything up a notch, going to the gym and walking 20 minutes at lunch and doing 10 minutes of light weight exercise at home everyday. But the weight has certainly slowed down. I still have never cheated.
Dont get me wrong, I am pleased that I have lost weight, my clothes are getting baggy(nice) and I am wearing clothes I haven't been able to wear for a while. But I think its the holiday season has me down. I dont have my parents anymore and I miss them so much. My wonderful daughter moved out earlier this year and my son is going to graduate in June. I think I am just feeling a bit lonely. I also dont know what to do. Do you ever think that your life has passed you by, and that the best times of your life are already gone.

Saturday

Sorry I took so long. I lost 3 lbs. So that makes it 21.5 in 4 weeks. I'm happy. But still have more to go. So no cheating. The boy in my class that I spoke about has lost 28 lbs. What a awesome loss . He is doing so well. Well, I just wanted to give the news. Back to house work. It is really beautiful today, except for the Santa Ana winds. Enjoy your weekend and be safe.

Wednesday-and its weigh night

Well, things have been running right along. I think I lost a little bit hopeful 3-4 lbs. But not sure. It has slowed down, I think I need to increase the exercise. Currently I am being very lazy about it. Small walks at lunch time. Haven't gone to the gym yet. I know that's what I need. I am so tired when I get home. (Usual excuse). I have the next two days off and I am going to go at least once. I have a busy day scheduled with the kids for Friday. Gonna go downtown see the sites that should count for a bunch of walking. I mean, I still have not cheated. I don't put any morsel of food in my mouth unless its on the program.

As you know I read a lot of weight loss blogs. Some are so interesting, some not so much (like mine). But I have read a few where either they have been blogging for year(s) and seem to be at the same weight as when they started the blog and some have loss and then gained it back and are starting over again. This scares me. I see myself in those. I hope that isn't me.  Now of course there are some blogs where people have kicked ass on the weight loss and are still maintaining it. Those are my idols.   But in all the blogs, one theme is current, it is frickin hard. I suppose its mind over matter (WTF does that mean).

But in almost, if not all blogs, I really like the people and they are all so encouraging to the newbies like me. God bless them!

Not sure how much I will post til Monday. I will try to get you my weigh in results from tonight on.

Monday and I was wondering

I was wondering why I didnt pick a better name for my blog. I mean I absolutely love Jack Sh*t and really enjoy Mrsfatass. I get a kick out the name Loser for Life or weigh in over my head.  I mean those are some really creative names. Of course mine is, Gracies' tough journey. (zzzzzzzzz boring). I guess it makes it a little more interesting that Gracie isnt really my name. But who cares. Man, I think I blew it with the name.

Ok, back to the blog, this weekend same ol' same ol'. I followed the diet, no cheating. But it was a crazy Saturday and I have to admit I am struggling. I fantasize about a Mc Donalds cheeseburger. How it feels and how it taste OMG. WTF is wrong with me, it should be getting easier. I would give my right nut for one, if I had those.  I am so scared to even taste something.

Saturday I babysat for my DD roommates little boy. We all know I adore that kid. But.... I had to get to their house by 6:20am. As it is, I have to get up for work at 5:10 am M-F so weekends I kinda like to sleep. Then my son went out with his buddies that night to our local University football game. Supposedly they were going to take the trolley. I texted my son, are you at the trolley station? His text we are on our way. (ok, my mommy antenna went up). I said are you on the trolley. I get a "ya" back. Ok, still doubting him but willing to take his word. That night, I get him some fast food (which smelled so good) and waited at the trolley. And lo and behold he comes popping out of his buddies convertible mustang smiling that sheepish grin. Grrrrr. He finally fessed that they drove to the stadium.  I told him, I would have been ok with that. Dont lie to me. If I catch you lying again, you will regret it. (What a putz) He said ok.  (Ya, I believe that).

Friday ..sweeeeet

I am so happy it is Friday. Best thing is, I have nothing planned this weekend. Sleep is my number 1 agenda. I get up at 5:10 am every morning to go to work. I drive 40 min to work and 40 minutes home every weekday.Ugh.  Now the time change will be this weekend so when I wake up it will be light. So much better for me. Still doing great on diet, cant wait to see how much I lose this weekend. Its been very warm here, yesterday was 102. But that does  give you the need to drink tons of water. Which I have been doing. Everyone have a safe and fun weekend.

Weigh in results...

Ok after three weeks on the HMR diet without any cheating is 18.5 lbs. Yippee, I lost 5 lbs lost night. Turns out I had only lost 1.5 lbs the week before. But I am still very please with these results. Husband says, you only lost 5 lbs, the first week you lost 12 lbs. (What a dick)  I said so, how many should I have lost?....

Good job I don't need his approval to justify myself.lol, I am so happy the weight is coming off and I cant wait till next weigh in. I will not "go out of the box".

On a different note, last week one of our cities finest (Policeman) was killed in the line of duty. Today is his funeral. On my way to work I came across the police procession, all with their lights flashing. It was beautiful. I cried a little it was so touching. God Bless our law enforcement. Please say a prayer for his family. They showed them on TV, what great kids he had. :(

Wednesday-

Doing very well on diet, weigh in is tonight. Its been very warm, which actually helps with drinking water and no-calorie drinks. Also helps with my (HMR) shakes. I blend them with flavorings and lots of ice. Yum. They are actually very good, like drinking an actual shake. (Yes I have a very good imagination). Any whoooo, things are going better than I ever could have imagined. Like I said tho, it sucks that I am so heavy that losing nearly 20lbs, nobody notices. Oh well. I pretty much have my daily menu set up .
Breakfast-Shake and cereal(their oatmeal)
Lunch-Shake
Snack-Shake
Dinner- Entree
Sometimes I treat myself to a (HMR) snack bar.
And then water water water....(and pee, pee,pee)

Election day

I am so happy it is election day. After today no more political ads on TV. OMG I hate them, they can run 2-3 times in a row. This morning, I'm driving to work, getting on the on-ramp to the freeway, and there is about 50 people waving their stupid signs. Vote for so-an-so. I mean, it gets to point of who I hate the least. Really, here in Calif, I think we have two terrible candidate. But then again, we do have an actor as Governor. God, we can be such fools.   What a relief tomorrow no more ads. Yah! Back to food commercials. :(    Has anyone ever noticed how many food ads run at night. I guess I never paid that much attention until I couldn't eat their food anymore. I don't even watch the food channel, which use to be one of my favorites.

Oh well what a rant eh?  Go vote!

Monday

Well shoot, I didnt get many kids at my house last night.  I had to bring candy in to the office today to get rid of them. I am still doing very well on the diet no cheating allowed. I think I am close to 20 lbs off. Of course, the sad thing is that at my weight no one really even notices it. It would take another 20 lbs I think at least. I mean I notice it, my pants are baggy and I feel better. Maybe really, thats all that counts anyway. Since I feel it and actually feel really good. Then it is a win-win for me. The really wonderful thing and what is keeping me on track is how fast I am losing. I know it always wont be that way but for now it is. Take care