I had a dream

Last week I had a dream that my brother T called me and said that Pat was doing worse and is in a lot of pain. He said also that there were issues with the medication. And they are in contact with hospice.
I woke up feeling so sad and sick to my stomach.

Saturday, T called me and said Pat is doing worse and in a lot of pain. His wife is in contact with Hospice. Apparently Pat is so weak. He can speak for a few minutes of the day and then is out for the rest of the day. He is in a lot of pain, and apparently there is some issues with the pain medication not being as effective as they want. He is also having some altered mental status.  His daughters and the grandkids are here.

Now, I am scared of sleeping and dreaming, I am afraid of having the final phone call. When I am awake, I jump if my cell phone rings.  I feel like a zombie and just waiting for the finale to hit.